968: A story about perfectionism and candles

So often things look right on paper, and we’ve done everything we can to make them ‘right’, only to find that it just doesn’t work for us. Fear not, you’re in good company.

Episode transcript:

Good morning, Daily Peppers, and a very happy Thursday to you. Now if you've been around here for a while. You remember me talking about my many, many experiences of decluttering and getting rid of 99% of what we own In order to try out long term travel. And today, I wanna share with you a funny story about candles and perfectionism. And I've got a feeling you might be able to relate. So getting rid of 99% of the things we owned involved making sure that the things that we have on us are things that can fit In the car. We had to be pretty damn selective. We knew that we had to travel light, and I was also not gonna be responsible for a flat tire because I packed too many candles.

And here's where perfectionism comes into it. I decided that I had to bring my 2 best candles that I would be really grateful that I bought, that smelled good, And also reminded me somewhat of home. Now I'm not one of those that needs the finest things in life, and no judgment if you are one of those people. Different things work for all of us, and that's part of the magic. But when it came to the candle selection, it's a bit of a different story because there was So much tied into it in terms of representing me trying to look after myself. I often buy candles as a way of, okay, well, if I get this candle And I like it when I do the writing project. That not only justifies the candle purchase, but it will also make me more likely to start that project, Which I think a lot of us have had with notebooks. So there was this pressure to pack the perfect candle And to bring notebooks back into it because we fucking love notebooks around here.

It's a bit like trying to choose the perfect notebook As a way of getting into something or beginning something, but then the notebook becomes a bit intimidating. Well, let me break down the irony Of the perfectionism that is happening with this candle because my dears, my candle's too fucking strong. I mean, when I light it, I get a headache. I mean, it's not a bad problem for a candle. When I unscrew the jar, you can literally smell it everywhere. Now, like I said, In terms of what you want from a candle, that is pretty high up there, and I think we've all had candles which are really disappointing. But for an ambiance part of things, it doesn't really work because I don't get the benefits of The light and seeing it flicker because it's too strong. And I also don't get to just stare at it lovingly for a little while and just zone out Because I get a headache.

And the reason I share this is not because I want you to get out the world's tiniest violin for me, But it is simply to point out that when we get stuck in trying to figure out the right way to do things or the best way to do things or the perfect way to do things, Even if it looks brilliant on paper, it might just not be the right thing anyway. And often our dream shitter will tell us that there is Either the right way or the wrong way, and that is simply bollocks. So if you are getting caught up in perfectionism in your own life, And if you are trying to desperately make the perfect or the right decision, the purpose of this episode is simply to give you a lighthearted Reminder that it might be right for all the wrong reasons, and sometimes the thing that makes most sense on paper Just doesn't make sense in real life. As for the candle situation, I am so glad I didn't get the 3 week version rather than the single week version. And I definitely have a newfound appreciation for the imperfect candles, for the ones that don't smell so strong But flicker beautifully. Have a good one. Here's to getting out of your own way, and I'll see you tomorrow.

Episode transcript automatically produced by Castmagic.io

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The Daily Pep! is the rebel-rousing, daily podcast for couragemakers, creative, multi-passionate and unconventional women.

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Every weekday, your host - writer, coach and professional rebel-rouser - Meg Kissack helps you build a creative and wholehearted life, one day at a time. Through short and snappy insights, reminders and stories, The Daily Pep! is here to remind you you’re not alone, and that everything changes when you believe you matter. Each episode is short and snappy, designed to fit in with (or help you start) your habits and routines

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